Thursday, March 27, 2008

Inspiration on the Ground

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Inspiration Experiment- creativity strikes

Inspiration is taking me on a creative journey. Though the time in Germany was mainly about family, bonding, bringing the history into the light, I felt compelled to shop for decoration material for our bedroom at home back in the UK. My mother is a great artist and also runs classes and workshops- I got inspired to paint with her. I haven't done that since 1998.

Inspiration in Germany

Inspiration brings me to the dentist...how does that work?
Well, my mum's inpired paintings inspire the dentist who, taking action is inspiring me by treating me as her pleasure...
hooooray to inspiration!

Monday, March 17, 2008

Inspiration- the effects of death in the family

Inspiration is all well when we are happy and in our own power. Things are going well, we love the uplift, thank you. But what happens when the loss of a loved one occurs- how does real life affect inspiration- can it be seen that way?
Will I hold up to the experiment? Or will breaking down bring me closer to what it's really about?

Friday, March 14, 2008

Life is a breeze. Put on a jacket…

I have gotten off track. Returning from Germany, I am trying to catch up with myself and the videos, my life, the experiment, my mood, the inspiration, my finances. Aaaaargh.
And I landed right in the puddle of fear based thinking. The place I know too well about, the place I got myself out of, with all my skills and tools and mind power…
And now I am soaked.

What happened exactly?
Germany was an emotional ride with the conversations with my Dad and the funeral and and and. I was not in the right place to edit and upload.

I came back and I was exhausted. I spent the next day in bed, had to cancel meetings and networking, I was busy crying and sleeping. Pulled another “trust your vibe” card.

It said: clear the past.

Funny that. So I did some “forgiving” in the comfort of my duvet.
Thursday I did get up and went for the editing appointment to finally get my showreel from the BBC1 programme done. I had tried to do it on my own time and time again- enough is enough. No reel, no agents.

It took so much longer than expected. It looks cool though.
Straight after I was invited to sing Karaoke with my friend and her former work colleagues.
BBC1 to Karaoke joint- that sounds like a reality show career summed up.
I had fun.

It’s the time of the month again and to be honest my capacity is taken by being a woman.
I don’t need to do anything.
But I did. I wanted to get my finances looked at which got me in a really bad mood. I basically spent all my savings- oh excuse me, I invested my savings in my training and network. Though surely a wise decision, I am skint now with no regular income and needless to say that really freaks me out.
So I did really well beating myself up for it mentally and worrying myself silly. Again.

I had a gig offer from Crystal Palace FC and am pursuing this tomorrow.
Offers are coming in for the end of the year… I am chasing agents for money. Meanwhile bills keep coming in and run slightly higher than expected.

And before I know it I am away from the land of inspiration, trusting God or whatever I was thinking about and just feel the burning desire to hide under my blanket.

Bereaving my grandfather made me feel silly today. How long am I going to cry over someone who died almost aged 99? It’s all good, for heaven’s sake, can’t I just let him go in peace and be grateful.

Hang on a minute, time out! How about allowing some time? Do I really expect an important person to die and me to get over it in no time? My grandad plays an important part in my life and in my psyche. My admiration for him went way deeper than the words " I am proud". This man was a legend, one of the last world war 2 survivors, someone who was chased out of his own country, who returned to help it build up with integrity. He was an amazing person, his own person, with dry humour and great intellect. More about him in " a tribute to my grandad"

I feel like I am making excuses for everything and the story in my head revolves around how difficult-excuse me-challenging it is for me at the moment and how I am in a transition and how I am sure all will be fine, I just don’t know how on earth to afford my friend’s wedding in Edinburgh next weekend and I find it all but inspiring to spend money I don’t have. And super uncool to cancel a friend’s big day. I can’t do that!!


Crystal Palace is happening, so I better get my hair in shape. After being quoted horrendous amounts locally, I go back to Kensington where Tony and Guy in Gloucester Road always take good care of me. Lucky I got an appointment. Talk about last minute.
So now I look much better, feel a bit better and get on with my evening. Rehearsing for tomorrow and finishing off bits and bobs like a dvd for a coaching client, backing up my Madonna tracks.

Oh big news: my external hard drive crashed.
That’s the device I loaded all my music on because I thought my computer was going to give up…which it did etc.
Well now that one isn’t responding anymore and all my tunes seem gone.
This is again potentially horrendous- but I am not willing to exite myself over it.
I am lucky that my backing tracks are still on the computer and that it’s working.
So I can actually still work.

I have also been asked to do a Video for my psychic coaching colleague and friend Gina Batt- she has followed this blog and decided to let me help her out with videos as well.
That makes me happy. I can’t wait. I might write some music for her site as well…who knows. It’s lovely to be asked, to feel like I can contribute to someone who so selflessly helps me. Gina got me onto Harborough FM radio and to play at their birthday party and she also connected me to an agent. I like this woman!

How can I get back into inspiration and back to my commitment to let my life be guided by it? If I don’t then this blog is just a blablabla. That’s not what I want.
I have committed myself and this is THE month where I can do this.

DO YOU TRUST GOD? DO YOU TRUST LOVE?
Love in the sense of let your partner pay-nooo. Though it’s nice to know he would if he could, this is neither an option nor really a way forward.

I am in God’s hands for whatever that means. It means to me that I am allowing the voice of love to guide me and stepping out of the frame of fear.

I feel like I am repeating myself. Literally. I have been here so many times. Why can’t it just be easy?
Yes I know- it can be. Change your thoughts, change your life.
Surrender to love and all that jazz.

One day when we are looking back on today, what is left? I want it to be inspiration, energy and great learnings. Memories of love and kisses and uplifting spirit that makes me and others fly…
On that note. Thank you for the opportunity to overcome the fear, to step into the light. Again.
I will do it as often as required. Because it’s a good step. An important step. My step.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Inspiration Experiment- the artist's way

Interviewing the wonderful international artist Maria Oppenheim, I am finding out about what inspiration is to someone who makes a living from it. It's about time- after all, she is my mum!

Sunday, March 9, 2008

Family and Inspiration

Or: where does inspiration go when family comes into play?

Inspiration is usually defined as something that comes to you and sparks your creative side.

Einstein had many inspired thoughts in the bathroom and he is not the only one. I would like to suggest that he had a good digestion - from my humble experience, It’s either “aaarrrrghaah” or ‘aha”.

So what happens when you are with your own family? The people who see you with their eyes more than you’d like and who seem to cling the picture they hold of you when you were having great “aha” moments in your pants…

Isn’t a family scenario the worst place to listen to your own inner voices leave alone the voice of God?

I have been with my family in Germany for the last few days and I did indeed find it challenging to sit and write by myself. There is a mum to talk to and a sister and a dad with whom I needed to have some conversations. There is the funeral with uncle, aunt, cousins attending which takes head space to say the least.

“What are you inspired to do today?” hasn’t really been the question on my mind. It’s not like I could just forget what I am doing in life but it does get pushed into the distance.

Has this ever happened to you as well? Your own life and what is interesting to you can get pushed off into the distance because your “role” takes over, other people’s expectations (as we would feel it) take over, business and duties take over?

Especially when it comes to family, it gets psychologically complex and there is so much going on simultaneously, how on earth do you keep up with yourself and yet allow yourself to fully connect?

I found out that when asking questions with seemingly no good answer, we may wish to ask a different question:

And here is where inspiration comes in again:

How would I love to be today?
Is the new question-

Who and how would I love to be? What can I learn from and for my family?

Given the fact we carry on the family genes, we might as well develop them well.

What will I be happy to have experienced with my family? What would I like my children to see in me?

My conclusion is this: if you can be who you are in front of your family- i.e. your own parents-If you can allow them to see how you think, love and act in your life, then you really achieved something.

There is a huge difference between showing them how you live and allowing them in-
I can take my parents to walk over the Millennium Bridge and they’ll be proud to see their daughter so grown up.

That’s lovely but a millennium away from allowing them to be part of my thoughts, worries, inspirations and life.

I like to live through and with honesty- it makes me feel free. I like to face my challenges in life, it makes me feel real and alive. It’s not always very pleasant. The saying “there is no pleasure without pain” has a ring of truth in this matter.

So I told Dad that I don’t understand him, I can’t read him and that may be because I didn’t want to hear more about it. I don’t like the way he lives so why spend energy on reading the almost non-existent face language (as words are scarce). I didn’t say it in a cold way, this was borne into a conversation about how he can communicate with me when I don’t get him and vice versa. We have a long standing history of not really connecting on a deeper level.

How would I love to be?
I would love to be me- freely in front of my dad. My father is a strong character and always had a strong influence on me in his non-speaking way. It’s almost as if I filled in the gaps with plenty of critical words. My father has the life of a hard-working man.
His attitude is work hard and you will have things you like. His life shows that you may also be unhealthy, overweight, and develop a love for beer. We all make different choices but it's sometimes hard to accept the people closest to us...

His attitude is also do what you love and for him that’s simple- he loves being a lawyer and running his business and he has grown it amazingly well. He studied law as a youngster and built on the rest.

These days, doing what you love seems to be a lot more complex for many. In a way I wish I had one lucrative subject I studied as a youngster (I studied acting) and could build on it. It’s so much easier to share. This is what I do, look everybody, now I am building on it. Look , everybody, I am very consistent, I know it and here is my success to show for it.

My life is not like that and maybe that's a good thing...
I would love to be free from the desire to prove myself. I would love to simply trust my way.
I would love to share that with my Dad and inspire trust in him. I would love to have Dad’s support, not necessarily his acclaim, just the simple trust that whatever I do, he is proud I am following my own interests.

As we learn in coaching world, set goals you can achieve yourself, do not set them on other people- so my part stays in liberating myself and following my inspiration.

How do I do that? By giving myself the love and support and allowing me to be me-
Honest and emotional at times. Confused sometimes, very clear at others. Accepting whatever is and embracing it as part of my journey whilst keeping my eyes on what it is I want.

Understanding all is possible and the importance lies not in what we think we can get but what is really important to us. And if I don’t know, then exploring that is the next step.
That means living my life. That I find inspirational.

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Inspiration FAQ



Q: Would you expect to learn to command inspiration?
A: That would be like commanding a power plug to give me energy. The energy is there, inspiration is available, all you need to do is to connect to it.

Q: How do you know you are listening to the external voice of God rather than the voices in your head?
A: Who says that God’s voice is external? God as in Love, creative source, is not an external force or person. It can be helpful to de-personalize God and reconnect to the source.
How do you distinguish that from the voices in your head- to quote Michael Neill: the voice of inspiration doesn’t think you suck.


Q: What does it do to be inspired when you can’t pay your bills?
A: A person come to life is by far more creative and resourceful than an uninspired human. Use that to find new ways to create money- that way you can do what you love, love what you do and get paid for it! And even if you don’t succeed at first, you are going to have a far better time. So worst case: good time, best case: good time, great money.

Q: Shouldn’t you do the basics first and then deal with feel-good concepts?
A: If “feeling good” and “basics” are two separated concepts for you, the question becomes what comes first and the term basics suggests a priority. To me feeling good or may I call it contentment and feeling alive is the absolute base of my life. If I don’t feel like I am living the life, what good is the rest?

Q: If you are guided through inspiration, what exactly is your direction in life?
A: If you are guided by TomTom what is your direction? Inspiration is a navigation system that makes the journey of life a meaningful and fun one. Where you want to go with you is up to you!


Q: Is inspiration dangerous when you are left to your own devices?
A: Definitely. When left at your own devices, anything can be dangerous, can’t it? Everything has at least 2 sides. Inspiration- coming alive is potential trouble. There will always be people who don’t like it. If you are trouble when left on your own and prefer not to be, join other people.

Q: What if you started spending money you don’t have because you felt “inspired”?
A: Inspiration will never threaten you to do what is harmful for you. If you can’t afford something, don’t buy it- that’s common sense. Inspiration is a feeling, not an obsession. You don’t have to do all that you feel inspired by- simply tuning into your inspiration however, allows you to live more fully.
Think about shopping-it’s not always the things we want the most, it’s what we think we get from having them that we are really after. Or from the experience of obtaining them.

However if you have a strong feeling about something and you find a way of creating it that is ecological for you, why not go for it?

Q: How do you distinguish inspiration from a whim?
A: Inspiration makes you feel more alive, happier and light. A whim is a shortlived desire and may feel more like a problem if you don’t get it.
Inspiration isn’t about getting all you want. It’s about listening to what you love.

Q: What is the difference between listening to your heart and listening to inspiration?
A: Listening to your heart is often used to tune into yourself and find your own voice and what’s important to you. If we talk about love and trusting love, listening to your heart is a great way to start. You can put your hand on your physical heart for example, draw 3 breaths and tune in. This is also a great way to find out how we really feel about a situation.
Inspiration describes more of a fresh breath into you.
It’s all connected as it were, so whatever works for you now, do it!

Q: Do you have to step out of your ego to open yourself up to inspiration?
A: The good news is you don’t have to do anything! The question to you will simply be what makes you come alive and makes you go WOW! Or YES!:_)


Q: Do you have to be religious to follow inspiration?
A: Nope. By the way, God didn’t invent the church. We did.

Q: I don’t believe in God, - can inspiration be a more practical tool for atheists?
A: Inspiration isn’t a thing as such and it doesn’t come with conditions of having to believe in God or anything for that matter. To be inspired is to follow what makes you tick, what drives you, what nurtures your soul, heart, passion, whatever you call it.
I am sure we can package it into a tool for atheists and make good money by putting it into a fabulous box, in the meantime enjoy it for what it is.



Please keep sending us your questions- sign up for our newsletter and get in touch!

x Evelyne

Inspiration Experiment Day 3

Day 3:
dear inspiration. Please guide me today. Please don't let me grow bored with myself. Please keep me so active that I won't have to deal with the rest. thank you.

Watch here for my happy clappy time following inspiration:

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Inspiration Experiment Day 2

It's Sunday, day 2. Does inspiration take a day off as well?
Why is it that we expect the great and it seems like nothing happens...but looking back it might have been a really important message delivered wrapped in the of the quiet mind.

Finally: Video 1


Hooray, the computer is back
here is the clip of Day 1 of the inspiration experiment. I have cut it to be 3Minutes and something so no matter how busy you are, you will have the opportunity to follow this experiment. This is not a staged production but a real life video diary programme.
Best, Evelyne

Monday, March 3, 2008

Day 3

It's monday and I got an appointment with the apple store tonight.
I can't wait! I have used the time without computer to listen inwards, get grumpy and also a bit worried. Today I got worried about money. Sitting at a computer at least makes me feel like I am moving my life forward.
Not having access to files, numbers and emails feels like missing out. Missing out on the great opportunities that I could have...I stop myself.
This experiment is not about doing. It's about letting inspiration guide me. Today it's been quite quiet. I went for a run this morning, that was nice, then dealt with the empty feelings that arose.
I guess that is the other side of not distracting myself. Emptiness will surface and it's not comfortable.
I ask the question: What would I love to do today?
and I don't even know. Practise my speech on confidence. But I don't feel in a position to do so and fatigue is creeping in.

Have you noticed how we get tired when we get off-inspiration? Or the other way round, you think you're tired but something happens, good news come up about a great opportunity, say a payrise is being discussed and suddenly you are SO awake?
Or you hear that you are being invited on a holiday?
And vice versa, when we get monotone inside our mind, the droning is lulling us into a trance of passiveness.

So that's what I could feel happening.
After sharing my thoughts with the camera, I went upstairs to read Paul McKenna's "instant confidence" (see my store below if you want to get it yourself) which is a sound NLP based system to gradually build confidence. Thanks to Photoreading, I got through the book in a few hours. And yes, I do know what it says!

If you are curious about photo reading, I will recommend my friend and colleague Marylin Devonish, who gives courses on the subject and knows her stuff! she is on http://www.tranceformationslimited.com/

I have bought a load of books on confidence as it's one of my main areas of work with people as a life coach. Inspired thought suggested I should have read pretty much every book on the subject to refer to if good and distinguish myself from if it's not so good....
Hence today, book nr. 1 instant confidence.

Now I am off to meet a comedian friend of mine, the wonderful Adam Bloom to ask him about how to best get accomodation in Edinburgh, what he's been up to and life in the comic world.
AFter that, it's apple store time! please let my computer resurrect...I'd like to edit the videos!

blessings,
Evelyne

Inspiration day 2

March 2nd was Sunday so a cosy day and no computer and it's ok to be cosy and not do much on a Sunday. Unless you spend time thinking what you could be doing if you had a computer.
I am suffering withdrawel symptoms from clear computer addiction.
Though it was a nice day anyway, I did window colour paintings that I had waiting for me for 4 years!
I decorated my hand bag. It helps to revert into creativity when the feeling of dissatisfaction creeps in. Something inside me wants to feel great and buzzing and inspired- after all isn't that what it's all about? And yet I had the Sunday blues, snoozing the day away, painting and cooking pan cakes and being ok with the world yet not overly exited.
I was wondering if following inspiration means I can't do my ironing. Well- if ironing is inspiring of course, go ahead!
Please tell me one person who is inspired by ironing.

However on a sunday with not so much to do and no computer to make me feel importantly busy, I felt strangely compelled to iron in front of the TV. It turned out to be my highlight of the day- as sad as this may sound to some, Thomas and I watched a program on five about sharks. The sharkman, where this guy sent sharks into trance by touching their nose- and swam on the back of a fin of a greate white! and a tiger shark preferred his touch to food- it was absolutely amazing and eye opening. We are trained to fear sharks as the phobic enemy and this program proved that with understanding and communication, the danger is transformed into friendship. The power of human touch is greater than we think and communication is more magical than I could have imagined!

Also isn't it fascinating that they pick up on fear? How can an animal pick up on fear? It means that fear is not just an emotion that we feel but something that travels and communicates.
Confidence does the same- it tranforms a whole situation. So does love and inspiration.

If emotions/states of mind are so powerful that they affect our environment, it makes the significance of this experiment even greater. Hooray!
This is not just about me being totally self- indulgent but by finding the source of inspiration and how to access and follow it, this can travel and transform you also.

Let's do it!

Evelyne

Inspiration part 1

March 1st,
I am all exited to get the experiment started. I go down to open up my computer- it won't start up. I try again. and again. and again. fumble with the plug.
It's almost as if someone was saying: who are you kidding, you think sitting in front of a screen is what you're meant to do to?

I love my computer. I spend a lot of time on my emails, listening to music, I edit videos, record music, use it as a radio- my computer makes up a big part of my life!
And now it won't work.

So...the inspiration experiment has begun: what would you love to do today?
where does inspiration lead me today?

Well, not to the apple store. Ihe had the one life exhibition in mind. But I must get the computer fixed. I could get annoyed.
Annoyed is not inspired. I let go. I choose inspiration and went to the one life exhibition.

I filmed myself in the morning and evenign and when the computer is fixed, I will upload the videos.
In the meantime, I got my boyfriend to budge from his laptop and am updating you in writing.

To me this is the proof of God's sense of humour. I thought this could be a fluffy cosy way to be in a good mood most of the time and the whole project starts with a challenge.
Ok then, let's play real. I can do that.
Please be gentle!

Evelyne